When you first meet me, you’d never know I was legally blind. If you met me 10 to 20 years ago, I would never have shared my secret. I wanted to blend; I didn’t want handouts; I didn’t want to be treated differently; I didn’t want people feeling sorry for me. In essence, you could call it denial.
I had enough sight to function and pull the wool over people’s eyes. However, getting by gets old and lonely, not to mention sucks the life out of you. The amount of energy it took for me to create a façade that I saw the world through the same lenses as a healthy set of eyes was exhausting. I realized it was wasted energy and questioned what was I trying to prove. I was reckless and endangering myself and recognized it was time to ask for help.
Although I have titled this entry “Denial to Acceptance,” I believe asking for help is my first step to a long and bumpy road of acceptance. This long road will also acquaint me and bring me face to face with anger, bitterness, sadness, loyalty, love, happiness and loss.
No comments:
Post a Comment